September 25, 2023

Binary Blogger

Are you a 1 or a 0? News, Thoughts and Reviews

Things To Do When Your Cloud Provider Goes Down

2 min read

I am critical of the Buzzwords, marketing hype and embellished promises around The Cloud. So I came up with a list of things you can do when your provider goes down.

What to do when your cloud service goes down

1. Blow your nose in Kleenex and compare the strength to your SLA contracts. Decide which is stronger.

2. Dream of the days of having engineers to scream at.

3. Start executing your Continuity Plan only to realize that your backups are in the same cloud that’s down.

4. Stare at the 30 foot fountain in the lobby that you bought with the savings.

5. Take a call from your buddy that works at a competitor bragging about his locally hosted up-time stats.

6. Continually tell your CEO that you are doing everything you can to wait for the cloud provider’s engineers to restore service.

7. Sketch up ideas to make the postmortem followup meeting last longer than 5 minutes and have more than 1 bullet point.

8. Send out emails via your Gmail account because the corporate email system is down but can’t because the network security service has all personal email accounts blocked and it’s outside your contract support hours to call someone to change it.

9. Play Minesweeper.

10. Start updating your LinkedIn profile.

11. Pull up the spreadsheet of cost savings and cross calculate lost $ per hour. See how long the savings hold.

12. Walk down to the Service Desk and smell the sweat pouring out of the call center.

13. Wonder if the construction crews called before they dug.

14. Laugh hysterically.

15. Explain to the CTO that there is a difference between redundancy, failover, high availability and backups.

End of Line.

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